Standing in the same place

For past few months, ever since my birthday, I have lacked a significant genuine emotion. Nothing has brought me severe sadness, happiness, anger, hopefulness or excitement. While most people may see no problem with this, I have been extremely bothered by it. Considering these are the things that spur my inspiration to write.

Ever since my birthday, life for me has been a whirlwind. I feel like I have had very few moments to myself and even less moments to do what makes me truly happy. This by no means is any kind of regret or blame put on anyone. I have been working, going out of town, moving and all with my usual social schedule. And while I love the life I have thus far, I wish my motivation to write was more intact.

I have felt stagnant in Dallas for some time now. I know it is not the people, because I have grown so close to many amazing people here, but I think it has more to do with the lack of spark between my synapses. I have been reading uncontrollably but that really isn't bringing emotion either.

The other night I was at a friend's house and something was said that made me realize I may not be the only person in the world that has a hard time conjuring up inspiration. I realized I was not really doing anything different day-to-day. Nights I would spend with the same people. Days at work. Going to the same places I had been going for over a year now. So I realized that was more than likely the reason for my feeling of stagnancy, and possibly my problem of inspiration. I miss being able to write almost everyday. I was much more in tune with myself when I was writing more.

So I changed my blog name and such to make it more about me. Music is part of me, so I am sure it will be making some appearances. But this will be me...trying to come up with something creative, and make some kind of revelation that could some day turn into a book.